"What if I'm not the superhero?
What if I'm the bad guy?"

When you can live forever, what do you live for?

tagboard codes here.

designer   !ferris.WHEEL².♥
basecodes   DancingSheep

Wad have happened to the unit?The attendance for today's training was terrible. The drills are all not up to standard. I guessed today is the only day out of my past 4 yrs in NPCC that i scolded my cadets in such a manner. Nv have i wanted to raise my voice to them but it is seriously disgusting to see their drills like that and their attitude towards NPCC and towards their drills.

Guess i have to think of something new to do to them in order for them to reflect upon their own actions, standard and attitude towards this training and the many trainings that is going to come our way very soon.

Nv have i expected that my christmas eve would be so fun. Went out with Dan dan, fiona, derrick and my bro and sis to orchard. it was my first time in my life that took me half and hour to get from orchard mrt station to taka. All of us squeezed through the crowd and got into taka to have our dinner den it took us another 15 min to get out of taka and onto the main streets. we practically squeezed our way through everywhere we went and seeing many ppl playing with the spray foam so we decided to ourselves some but we walked for quite sometime b4 we found ppl selling at the place where i met my parents. den had quite alot of fun and the most fun thing ever is to be attacked by whipped cream. the starbucks crew came out onto the streets with some spray liked objects and started attacking us with the whipped cream and out of so many ppl i got most of the whipped cream. Not long after that we went back home. 12 of us including my uncle, aunties and my parents together with the few of my frens, we squeezed into my father's van and he drove all of us back... everybody smelled like spoiled milk that was being poured onto our body.So all of us have to tahan the smell all the way to yishun as all of us stays in yishun.

But in conclusion, i felt that it is really a fun night that i had together with my frens and family...

HOHOHO...Merry Christmas to all...
May all ur wish come true ...

but wad i feel about festive season nowadays is that it is kind of quiet as everybody is kind of like staying at home and the streets are very quiet not like in the past whereby u can really see alot of ppl on the streets playing their hearts out and enjoy the festive season together with the ppl around them although they could all be strangers... But now... is totally different... but nvm... guess is due to the change of generation...

i am seriously wondering whether i am up to standard or not... i feel that even after i am back from my atc at ubin... i feel that i jus went through motion when i was there and nth went into my head and in another few hours time i will be going for my passing out parade training and will be passing out this sat...

i am seriously thinking that i am not up to the standard to continue on and lead the unit again...mayb the other person might be better den me...

Cry... wadever my senior told me i think have gone to waste ... i am regretting going for this course and wasting my time there...

I don noe if anyone of u that have read this blog knows hu i am but if u do u can jus read and mayb jus tag me and leave me some comments.

But nvm... anyway will be away for the next 4 days and will only be back on the 19th...

Suddenly jus have the urge to blog and my mind is kind of in a mess now...but don noe why sia.
i seriously don noe if i am really up to the standard to lead the unit again as a Cadet Inspector. I feel that there is still something in there that is stopping me from going any further. But i have yet to be able to recognise wad it is. So wad is the prob with me?

Seeing everyone progress and i seem like i am very far from them as i guess i am not progressing. But wad is seriously happening in me and around me?For the past nine days in RC, i feel that i am physically there and not mentally there as i feel that nth really gets into my brain. I guessed i have jus wasted nine days of my entire life doing nth and jus practically going through motion and i might be going to waste another 4 days of my life.

But we shall see to it as i have yet to attend the camp yet and hope that i will really enjoy myself and learn more from the camp and not jus going through motion.

I actually did not really think of posting on a blog. But i think sometimes i really need a means to express my thinking and feeling which i normally cannot show or say in front of some of my frens or even family.

So i guess this is where ppl can really see the real me and know hu i really am and can thus know more bout me...