10 days had passed...
Was watching tv jus now and 1 of the sentence struck me...
Ren sheng de xuan ze you na me lan mah???
I think my answer to it will be...
Ren sheng de xuan ze di que jiu shi you na me lan...
Often or not we are making choices between alot of things in life... When you want to think of not making that choice... The decision will still come back sooner or later until the matter is solved... The choices in life are often limited and when u are forced to make choices u will soon have to do it no matter wad...
For me, I am a person who choose to procrastinate until there is no choice... But do i have a choice of not choosing between certain stuff??? I seriously don noe... but shall let fate do its job... I believe everything is fated... Whether or not is it BGR or friendship... Its all planned...
Sometimes i think this matter is very contradicting... People says that everything is fated and planned for and yet there is another saying that says ren ding sheng tian... Sometimes,i think the more i think, more qns will pop into my head...
I really qns myself whether thinking so much is it a good or bad thing... Thinking about the future jus scares me off the reality... But reality is something that cannot be avoided... Thinking about BGR, family, studies, friendship and many many more things sometimes all i can do is jus sit down and be saddened by all the facts and stuff... Really hope i have the ability to settle all the problem and not disappoint anyone... The most impt thing is that i would not want to disappoint myself over and over again... (Come on man!!! Where have my optimistic character gone to??? Have it been scared off by reality and all the problems???) Jus hope that i can face the reality and problems optimistically...
How I wish if I can go back in time when I am still a baby... How I wish I would nv grow up... How I wish I can jus stay at that time when I am free from problems and troubles...
After ranting so much all are jus "How I wish..." , seriously need to get my mind off from all the problem in the reality but that is jus purely impossible... School is going to start soon and there comes another stress... Nagging parents and u shld noe wad they are nagging about... not only nag about me, they nag me abt my bro and sis and even my darling... haiz... My GPA drop... His GPA not good... why bro fail this and that... why is my sis not improving, why is she still failing this and that... I mean, how much of all this am I able to control... I seriously don noe... besides the part that concerns me, I think the others are beyond my control...Not even thinking if i can control my own part properly...
Sometimes I seriously think about my future prospect but it jus darkens the path infront of me... I seriously don noe wad to do...
Shall jus stop thinking off all these things for the time being after pouring it out all here...
Haiz... Think of my darling think until want to die liao lah...
Think too much liao... Think until dream of him jus now during afternoon nap... This is also the first afternoon nap after so many many days... That would be partly because normally I would have slpt till almost 2pm due to slping at earliest of 4am in the morning... But I slpt at 1am plus last night and was woken up by sms in the morning at 9 plus... One crazy fellow text me in the morning " Jie Jie Good Morning". I was thinking who the bloody moroon was... ended up it was one of my mum's ex-colleague i suppose... den ended up he was saying "I am Jason.28 years old" den my reply was like "ok...". His next msg came and was like "Can we be friend? What about you?"... I was like... siao one... early in the morning disturb people's beauty slp and still want o make fren... crazy fellow... den i cannot be bothered to reply any more...
Siao one... if i meet more of this kind of ppl i will seriously scream my head off at them for disturbing my slp man...
Anyways... Counting down to the days darling is coming back liao... Hehehe...
Thinking of it makes me happy... hehehehe...
6days and 23hrs and 30mins...
= 167hrs and 30mins...
= 10050mins...
= 603000secs...
Yay... counter getting lesser and lesser liao... heheheh...
Jia you Jia you... Somemore, somemore...Soon... Soon... hehehehe...
Shall end of here for the time being ya... hehehe... Buaiz peeps...
